coming to the end.....

Should I be excited, scared, anxious?

I've got 4 weeks left of my university course and then, all going well I graduate with my teaching degree.

It's only taken me 10 years. WOW!

Yes, worth a few fireworks! :)

I am scared...... scared of failing, which is something I know we all have to deal with at different times.

For me this has been a huge stumbling block in my life. I think when I gave it all up, I'd figured I couldn't do it - not because I couldn't. Yes, there have been some tough moments - but it's doable, but more because I was scared.

I've realised lately while I've had so many other things going on in my life that I'm one of those people who doesn't get scared often - but when I do it has an almost paralyzing effect on me. I freak and become incapable of making a decision or just move on. It's the most bizarre thing for me to realise and have to deal with - because I've never really been a person who gets scared of much.

Staying at home by myself has never worried me. Swimming out in the ocean doesn't frighten me, I happen to love the dark, will happily drive across country by myself.

I've come across many people who actually don't like doing some of those things and I've often struggled to understand that kind of fear.

So, here I am. A new season approaching. Some massive changes, and I refuse to get scared.

Watch out world, here I come!

goodness.....

Again.... another month.

Whew.

I can't believe my trip to Australia was already over a month ago now. While I say that.... so much has happened since then.

My camera broke while I was in Oz, which caused some heart flutters. Th

ankfully I've just got it back from the repair agent, which is super exciting. :) Of course, over a month without a camera is quite something.

To celebrate I bought a macbook pro. Actually, I need to start calling it an investment into ME.

I've just scored the job of wedding photographer at my second wedding which is in December, and since I moved and sold my old PC, all I had was my work laptop, which really wasn't got to cut it for editing photos.

In breezed the beautiful mac.

I've hardly had a chance to sit down and play with it, so still getting my head around things. But so far, so good.

To celebrate - the photos are of Theo who came out to keep me company while I got a horse ready for a show the other night.

Theo and Rhapsody..... sharing the love.

the weekend looms...

~
I've got my first gig as "wedding photographer" this weekend. (official wedding photographer that is!)

WOHOOOO!!

Of course nerves are starting to kick in, but I'm excited too.
I've been pouring over photographer's sites online checking out different ideas. I'm not sure that much has stuck...... and I have to keep reminding myself that actually I can do this. The more I try, the harder I make it, the worse the photos.

It's funny - having been to so many weddings, having been in so many wedding parties, I know how it goes, and yet I can't seem to just let go and trust myself.

It's going to be fun!!

So, hopefully I'll have some photos to post of the happy couple on Monday.

boat by moonlight in Rarotonga

flight home....

I flew out at 7am, so had the early morning colours. Was a great flight - with some stunning scenery.

the hills are alive with the sound...............

The view from Jiljanes house. I could quite happily sit outside and watch the ever changing picture - especially at sunrise and set. My first year in Christchurch, I lived a little further over on the hill so I had a view of the sea and the alps. It was amazing! I could lie in bed and watch the sun come out of the ocean in the morning, and then set over the alps.
Gordie and I joke about finding another house up there. Not the most perfect of houses, but he still declares I was the best flatmate ever. :) He wasn't bad either... even brought me flowers for cooking him dinner... was quite the deal.

Christchurch - Botanical Gardens

The Peacock Fountain - only, there are no peacocks on the fountain, and would
you believe the fishy looking creatures are supposed to be dolphins. Very creepy looking dolphins.

a while.....

Life has been crazy busy, and there is so much to catch up on......

My friend Jilyjane from Christchurch came up to visit a couple of weeks ago. It was so nice to catch up with her! We went and stayed at a little township in the Coromandel and explored by day - which even included some lovely lazing in the sun at Hot Water Beach.

We had two days up there, which was perfect.

Now we're busy plotting where we can run away to next...... Australia is looking good. :)

back in the land of reality......

~
The weekend was super lovely!

We visited several vineyards to eat scrumptious food, and drink fabulous wine in incredible settings. It really was all about eating, drinking and laughing all weekend.

We wandered the town center in search of all things girly. :) And while we were all fairly restrained in purchasing - I had great fun looking at things.

I did manage to order something for mum, which we saw when we were last there a few years ago - not bad planning for September.

Oh - and other big news... my brother got engaged last week. They had originally thought about having the wedding in Rarotonga in August - but it sounds like it will be closer to home in Septmeber, which still doesn't leave them much time to plan a wedding.

I'll be back to post photos later....

Peace and Joy!

xxxx

next wedding.....

So, Mike and Kate tied the knot.

I can't believe how long ago that was already.

I flew down early Friday morning, and arrived in Christchurch in time for lunch with my old flatmate Jackie and friend, JJ. Was absolutely gorgeous. Really girly chat, sitting up on the hill, catching up.
Certainly food for the soul.

I think we were there for over 3 hours. Then Jackie and I went to check out a movie. Laughed ourselves silly.... before I had to go and pick up the rental car.

The adventure continued from there......

Because the wedding was in Alexandra (about 5 hours south of Christchurch), I had arranged to stay with Ben's mother in Geraldine. Was quite lovely, as she's just moved, so I got to see her new abode, and catch up with her on everything that had been happening.

The next day was a slow start before I got all dressed up, and took off on the next leg for the BIG day.

Arrived with time to spare, and got to have a quick catch up with Mike.

I don't like my chances of ever getting another photo of him dressed up..... so had to grab a few.

It was a gorgeous day, and the ceremony, lovely.

I actually got to meet Mikes old flatmates, who I'd obviously heard alot about - though funnily, they knew very little about me! Anyway... it was quite lovely to meet them.

Hillary and James. I actually need to write to Hillary. We have big plans on catching up at some stage. Hopefully we can do that.

As it turned out, it was fine not having ben there to keep me company - though I haven't heard from him since he called to say he was sorry that he stuffed up. I guess he's too busy with Sarah. His mum was hillarious about it all. She couldn't believe that he would just blow me off like that. Ah, but that's ben for you. Pity. It would have been nice to have caught up on everything, and heard about his big adventures. It just hurt that I wasn't important enough to make that bit of an effort.

Anyway... as is always the way, when you're thrown in those sorts of situations, you make it work, and I guess you're that much more likely to make the effort to meet the people around you.

I stayed the night at Dansey's Pass... which was awesome. It was the most amazing stary night you could imagine. Just blew me away that the stars could be that much brighter!!!

The next day I drove back up to Christchurch, and ended up having a very improptue dinner at a pizza place with some friends. And wow... was it nice to catch up with them!!!!

There were a few tears when I had to jump on the plane and leave Christchurch again, but I know this is where I'm meant to be.

I'll be feeling much better about it all when I've got some friends. When my phone rings. And when I don't have to go and do everything on my lonesome. hehehe.

The joys of growing up, huh.

The quote of the week.

"Pain is God's megaphone" ~ CS Lewis