almost...

who would have thought the middle of the year would be here so quickly?
much like winter - both have snuck up on me with such stealth like abilities.

the fog clings to the hills till late morning, leaving the city in a damp state, while also causing chaos for drivers, such as myself first thing in the morning. while I appreciate that we do need to change our driving to the conditions, people seem to go into panic mode with the fog. I don't understand it at all. It's more scary and dangerous to drive in the fog because of the drivers!

So, with the middle of the year, comes a time to think of all the missions that were planned for the year. I guess a time to reflect on hopes, on visions, and to just get refocused on all these things.
It's a little scary to think about everything that I wanted to do, and have not come close to actually making the time for them. But on the other hand - there are some things that hadn't been thought of which have happened... and for some reason, those are most often the best times!

Sorry - kind of feel like I'm in circle mode tonight.

The day has been long, and somewhat frustrating with work, and not knowing enough to feel as though I can actually do my job properly. I'm have lessons tomorrow on the wonderful world of Transformers. WOHOOOO!!! yes, watch out world. Once I get these big beasts figured out there will be no stoping me! :) hehehehe

Ahhhhh... how I do miss the world of cutlery from time to time. A plate was such a simple thing to explain, and sell. But where would the challenge be to stay in a safe little world of things understood. Where would the growth take place? And would we become who God had intended us to be?

Right.... best go wander to bed.

Peace and prayers. xxx

day trips

National Park..... pretty much the middle of the North Island on one of my trips.
And below, the Chateau I keep thinking I should go and spend a weekend in. It's pretty lush on the inside.... velvet curtains, a grand piano in the lounge area.... I think it would be fun, though perhaps lavish?


And these guys..... well.... some of the balloons at the fiesta back in April.
I've been awfully slow!

The other morning I woke to this... had to grab the camera and snap away......
I took off to have coffee, and when I got back, this was the next shot.....


who could complain about that for a Saturday morning view.

I know I need to do a catch up, and I will.... but I really want to get some photos uploaded as a start to it all.

Prayers flying for everyone over yonder...

Kia kaha.
xxxx

Easter - the trip it became.

the full moon, which was the beginning of it all.

I had planned to go North to Goat Island; the oldest marine reserve in New Zealand to swim with the fishies. There were 5 of us all set to go, so come Friday morning I had the truck all packed to go, was just going to head off when I turned on my cell phone. I don't get reception in my room, so if I leave it on all night it spends the night looking for reception, consequently killing the battery by morning.
Anyway... 3 messages in the middle of the night. First one - someone has pulled out. Second, the other person from Tauranga has pulled out. Third - the other person has pulled out - would you be interested in just doing a day trip on Saturday?!

WHAT!!!!

I called, and we chatted about people who have no idea how to commit, and everything else. I was all packed so I was going somewhere. I'd been looking forward to this for weeks, and just felt so upset that it had all turned to custard. My opinion of North Islander's, well, people just went down the gurgler. I had tried. I was steping out of my comfort zone going on this trip with people that I didn't know, and felt a little anxious about it in some respects, since I've been living in comfort zone somewhat - but I was still very excited. Anyway....





I ended up driving up to my aunt and uncles place on the Whangarei Heads. It was a great drive up. I found this fantastic place to go camping right next to the beach, and just cruised along before getting there.
Also stumbled on this fantastic little hall. Absolutely amazing spot to have it. It was just a picture perfect moment. :)




My cousin and her husband were up there too, along with some friends of theirs I had met last month at the fireworks. Was nice to catch up with all of them.
Also, turned out that the Canadian Consulate was staying. hehehehe. Yes, i got to smooze with the big wigs. Not only big wigs, but Canadians! :)
She was incredibly positive about Calgary, and the boom that was happening there now. Didn't think I would have any problems finding a job. All very encouraging to hear right now.

I ended up having to cook them breakfast the next day, as Ros was running around getting ready for something. It would have been quite the comedy for someone to have watched. The husband came in declaring they had got times wrong, and they had to be somewhere much sooner. I quickly had to get coffee going, water boiling for the eggs, find the toast.... which led to me not realising that somewhat had switched the stove off, so the water wasn't boiling, I burnt the toast, and the coffee grinder didn't grind. hehehehe. I even broke the yoke of two of the eggs. Quite classic. I think I'll stick with the backpackers where I don't have to deal with rushed breakfasts.



I drove over to this great little beach on the west coast for the afternoon. The scenery on the way was so lush and green, and there just seemed to be such depth. The trees were starting to change colour. It was great!









Lots of stops on the way home, including going to Goat Island. It was packed, with lots of kids everywhere, and noise filling the air. I swam away to cool off, though didn't really get to enjoy the fish. The whole area is awesome... cute little town, and I'm sure plenty to see and do. By then I was just in cuise home mode. I tired to get some pics of the fish swimming in the rock pools, though not many wanted to co-operate with me. I spent some time fish spotting with this cute little girl. She got so excited every time she found one, that the fish promptly scurried off. I didn't mind.




So, it ended up being a lovely long weekend. I kept hearing the same words from God.....
"Be still and know that I am God."

It was comforting, while everything I try to control and make better, and just focus too much of my energy on just fell through my fingers, I am reminded to let go... let God control and have the peace, realising that He's not about to drop me.

Hope everyone else had a wonderful, most blessed time.

trips around

I headed out to the Mt the week before Easter. Was absolutely picture perfect day. Would have thought it was the middle of summer, not autumn.

The pohutakawas were blooming, which was very late. But they looked gorgeous against the blue sky.

A huge ship had docked that day, so there were tourists everywhere, which was kind of different. There are always lots of people there - but these ones were in flocks armed with bags.

I've never really thought of the area as being one where you would want to shop - but I guess as a tourist?





I got to have a quick walk around the Mt on my way home. There weren't too many people, which was nice. I guess the tourists were too busy with the shops? hehehe. It was the perfect lead into the Easter weekend.

big day out

Yes, I got to take Tawhai on his first fair ride. He was hillarious!!!!! I thought he might start crying after the first round - but he just started laughing away. Very cute.

We went to go and watch my cousin in the National Shearing Champs. She was absolutely brilliant - ended up 6th, and is still the only girl to do so well. She just blows me away with her strength and calm manner doing something so hard..... and she has such style about her too. :)
Took this picture of Tawhai with Sam afterwards (Emily's husband) He's a mans man with the softest nature... and the ability to grow amazing spuds! :)

pics from this week

I was off exploring on Tuesday..... up and around the Coromandel. Was a bit grey, but still such a great place to be. Was kind of one of those hot sticky days in the rain. Bizarre how that happens.

I'd promised to take some pictures for a friend who hasn't ever been up there - so, here you go!

<--------Those are the Dr Seus Trees

















































Just to give you a glimpse. :)

another year....

Oh yeah.....

Friday is that day again......

Can't believe that it's been a year since the night in the park with all my friends and mum and dad flying down to surprise me.

This year......
I'm working and that's about it.

I've been invited out to dinner with a bunch of other people in Hamilton from different churches, and I think I'll go along to that - though it will be lonely, not sharing my day with friends.
I had thought about having a birthday dinner on Saturday night - but Tamati is going away for the weekend, and brother David is in a bit of a funk right now, not returning my calls... so it would be mum, dad and alex. hehehe. Actually, Alex I think Alex may even be working?
Another weekend?

It is, after all, just another day.

As ever, thoughts running rampant.

xx

Bonjour!

Salut mes chers amis!

Another weekend breezed past, and it was all a blur.

My brother, sister in law and neice and nephew came to stay. It was lovely to have a full house, and to have the company, but it really did stretch my patience too.
They'd all been very sick that week, and so I'm sure Tessa and Tamati needed a break - but Evita was being quite fussy, and just wanted to be held all the time.... poor Tawhai must be teething, and while he's just the best at finding things to do - I felt quite bad that I didn't give him more attention.

I was left feeling drained and with the thought that I would just not make a good mother. My time as a nanny and in the classroom had indicated as much.... being an aunt has confirmed! Hehe. It's not really an issue, but a passing comment.

Anyway.... I've since been hit by the passing bug, and spent all of yesterday in bed, or in the bathroom... and today, while better - still not able to sit for long periods. Thankfully the spa is such a relief. I can go and sit out there and almost fall asleep in a state of bliss. The heat seems to help my stomach settle a little and eases those aches and pains from the tractors which visit requently during the night, running over my back and legs. hehehe.

This however may be the motivation that is required to get me down to the local video store to become a member. 10 months later and I still haven't been down there to get out a dvd, which is most bizarre... I don't think any of my friends would believe me if I told them that. Today, I do feel like watching something though. :) A nice sappy movie to keep me company.

The movie "Miss Potter" has just come out here, and I was supposed to go and see it last week with a new friend. (yes.... I'm getting out there and meeting people, slowly but surely. hehehe) I ended up in Auckland though, and he got bogged down with work. hehehe. Maybe this week we'll actually get there?
Yesterday we had a cute little visitor, so I thought I would include a picture of her for you. For those of your who are Beatrix Potter fans, such as myself - you should have no problem recognising her.

Yes.... Miss Tiggywinkle came a-visiting. And Twiggy was most curious.....


I think Twiggy thought she'd found a new friend. And while a hedgehog will hardly hurt, not something to dig your claws into.

It's rather unusual to see one out at day light, so hope that this little one was ok. It was just as dusk, and it seemed quite happy foraging around looking for slugs and snails. I have no idea where it wandered off to after this.... but hopefully it stayed clear of the horses hooves.

Right.... must move..... tickets to buy for Brooke Frasers concert - which I'm most excited about, and better try and get something done with this car.

Be blessed
xx

from the office desk

The American story.....

Wow, it's almost been a month since Valentines eve. And while this all happened on the night, that really isn't the point. :)

I had band practice that night.... and when I got out, my phone had not one, but two messages from my parents asking me to stop and get milk on my way home. Kind of funny since they both rang independently. Great minds?

So... off I trot to the super market. It's a place I don't actually mind when the hoards have all gone home to sleep, and you can meander the isles in blissful peace. I wander around, perhaps a little aimless, and endup with an arm load of things. (I'm always of the opinion that if I don't get a trolley than I won't buy more things than I need, because it's just too difficult to load up - but what ends up happening is that I struggle to carry everything!)

To the check out I go, and stand behind a guy.

Now, super markets aren't really the place to strike up a conversation. People generally stand around and mind their own business. They look at what the person in front of them has bought. Make all sorts of judgement calls, just to wild and crazy conclussions, and that's the end of that.
I however have this need to talk - especially since I only seem to talk while I'm at work. So, standing there, this guy is waiting for the check out chick to find something, and we start talking. He's from America - so immediatly I have more to say.
~ where in the States are you from?
~ How long have you been here?
~ Where have you been so far?
~ Favourite spots
~ Where to next
It goes on from there until things are finally sorted, and off he goes.

This is where you would imagine normalcy accomplised once more, and it is for a moment.

I walk out to my truck and literally throw the stuff into the passengers seat - there really isn't any other way of doing it. Then, when I look up, I see that the guy is parked right in front of me.
I don't think there was any real thought going through my head.... except, Why not?

I walk over and say " please don't think me a stalker, or strange, but I wondered what you were doing now? Would you like to go get a drink?"

We end up standing there and talking for a while, then eventually head off to a cafe. We even find parking right next to eachother, and wander up the street..... sit at the cafe and talk until the place is all packed up around us.

What blissssss... a night of conversation, different opinions, stories of travel and life.

Yeah.... could once actually ask for more on what is supposed to be this extravagent night of romance? I don't think so. In fact, I think that officially rates up there as my best Valentines night - one with a complete stranger, who I may never see again. No romance, no motives, no worries. hehehe

Madness, I know!

march, already!

The weekend is zooming by, and I thought if I don't sit down now, and make time, when will I get around to it again?

Firstly; Mr Ed, I so appreciate your notes, and constant encouragement. You really are so super sweet to stop by and check up on me. To anyone else who stops by... thanks to you too. :)

Right.... some pics that I had to share


Firstly; Tawhai and Popa! hehehehe... yes, one of Tawhai's first words is Popa, and he says it with such convection and excitement. We've come to the conclusion that while he loves Popa, what he really LOVES is the tractor! Whenever they are driving out in the country now, Tawh gets all excited and starts saying Popa, regardless of where they are. Has made for some tearful drives. But, wow is it ever cute when he does arrive here, and jumps out of the car to find Popa!

Next bit of exciting news; Tawhai is trying to say my name! :) Yipeeeeeeeee....... ok, so CJ is coming out like Yeyay, but I'll take whatever I can get. He even chants it around the house, especially after I've been around there. How cute is that?!

Evita is growing super quickly, and I suspect is going to jump straight to walking. She is a mover and a groover, and hates to be still. Quite hillarious to watch, but exhausting to have to try and hold. We had her dedication last weekend at church, and she wore a dress that was made from Tessa's great grandmother's wedding dress. Absolutely gorgeous, and for the first time she just snuggled into my arms through most of the service. It was so precious to have that time with her, and just cherish this beautiful little girl. I've got a couple of photos on my computer that I need to get over here to put up.....
For now, this one will have to do. Tamati being his usual cheeky self.


Tamati's response to my saying that I was looking to move was one of panic, quickly followed by one of madness. He's adament about setting me up with some guy. Yes, he's of the belief that if I should fall madly in love, then I wouldn't make such threats. It was such a funny process to watch. Instantly naming off guys with Tessa.... " what do you think of so and so, and then there's.... "
I had to laugh.
I'm not looking for a guy to make me feel better about living here. I would like some friends to do things with. I'm becoming more of a recluse, and it's scaring me - as it's becoming more comfortable, and I know that I'm starting to make less of an effort.
Sure, I still ask people out, and am ever the friendly one.... but it's becoming less of an issue.

I'll have to spill the story about the American in another blog. hehehe.

Hope the weekends have been warm and filled with much laughter. It is certainly an awesome thing to have people around who fill your heart with warmth and cheerfulness.

Be blessed.
xx

feeling....

hungry!

and in the midst of the hunger pains is a deeper feeling of anticpation and longing.

I can't wait to jump on a jet plane and wing my way out of here!

The more I think about it, the more I can't wait, and the more I can't wait, the more eager I get, and you know what... I think it may be a vicious circle, and it's making me dizzy.

So... that's me.

Feel like I may have jumped off the spinning world for a bit, but slowly finding my way again.

Bless you guys!

big thoughts!

ok, maybe not big... but funny!

Was just flicking through my new office calendar and stumbled across this great picture of a hipo's head appearing from beneath a whole lot of water plants - the quote underneath it reads:

"There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line."
~ Oscar Levant. American pianist and actor.

Love it!

I wish I could post the picture too - but the scanner here is one difficult beast to convince to do such tasks. You'll just have to use your imagination. :)

xx

words....

brooke has just come out with a gorgeous new cd. I've managed to misplace the cd cover. No idea where it's gone... so that will have to wait....
but this morning I was digging through some of the older cd's and found one of my favourites - bebo norman; try.

my favourite song would have to be "nothing without you", and today the words really struck a chord in my heart - so here you go.

take these hands and lift them up
for i have not the strength to praise you near enough
i have nothing, i have nothing without you.
and take my voice and pour it out
let it sing the songs of mercy i have found
for i have nothing, i have nothing without you.

all my soul needs
is all your love to cover me
so all the world can see
that i have nothing without you

take my body and build it up
may it be broken as an offering of love
for i have nothing without you

but i love
with all my heart
with all my soul
with all my mind
and all the strength that i can find

take my time here on this earth
and let it glorify all that you are worth
for i am nothing without you


~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

woweeeee

First day back at work.... and alas, most places are still closed and away on holiday for another week meaning that I'm in for a dull week.

I was hoping for madness, headless chicken kind of running around catching up on everything that had backpilled over the last 2 weeks, but no joy.

Means however that I can quickly jump on here. hehehe... yes, there is always a brightside to these things.

My brain is swinning in thoughts in so many different directions, and yet - I can't seem to grab any one thought and concentrate on it long enough to form anything comprehensible. It's quite a state.
And I'm reminded of the passage in the bible that mentions we are not to be a wave, tooing and frooing which would make us wicked. (Isaiah 57:20,21)

20 But the wicked are like the tossing sea,
which cannot rest,
whose waves cast up mire and mud.

21 "There is no peace," says my God, "for the wicked."

Not so nice sounding. But I understand it. Anyway... I guess I'd better get constructive here, and figure out what will be happening this week while things seem to be quiet. I'm thinking that a trip to Tauranga may happen tomorrow.

I'll keep dreaming of snow from here, while the temperatures start to rise.

"The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of etenity, or life, of the marvelous structure of realisty. It is enough if one tried merely to comprehend a little of this mystery every day. Never lose a holy curiosity."

Albert Einstein

a sailing we will go.....

A friend (Colin) had his 30th birthday, back in November with a trip sailing around the Tauranga harbour. It was a stunning night catching up with old friends from uni days.











Si, who I hadn't seen in 10 years when I left for the States and he continued with his degree before taking off himself. It was so good to see him, and I know for me, it hardly felt like it had been that long - though we've been terrible at keeping in touch. And crazily enough, he's the one who is probably the closest to where I'm living now, but do you think we've caught up again since that night. Nope! hehehehe


Rhonda.... who has got to be one of the greatest people out there. Just super outgoing and caring. You need someone like her in your life. I actually saw her the following weekend as well, which was pretty impressive. It had been a few years since I caught up with her while she was down in Christchurch. She'd gone to live in England for a while, and got back last year, and seems to have gone into settle down mode - having just moved into a house of her own with her partner "G". We decided over the weekend that we really needed to set aside one weekend that we would all get together. It's too easy for the years to slip by, and for us not to see eachother at all - unless there's a wedding or something.
So... this year, Rhonda and G have said we can all crash there for a midwinter Christmas.... which reminds me, I need to email everyone now. :)


And then... the other 2 party girls; Tammy and Nicole. They stoped in the other day on their way back North after New Years.... and I realised again just how real and lovely they are. I hadn't spent alot of time with them, though we did catch up over in England many years ago. Since then Tammy and I have fired a few emails to eachother, but never caught up. Both of them are actually great at making that extra effort at keeping in touch and actually seeing other people. Very special.

We were trying to figure out how to make friends - since they've both moved North after being over in the UK for a few years, and not being in a big city. Tammy came out with the great facts of the different age groups - how are 20 year olds we're more social. Our world revolves around our friends. In your 30's you're generally settling down, married, starting families and your world revolves around that. In your 40's more of the same... the friends that you have are generally through your kids, and in your 50's you go back to being social and finding friends outside of everything else.

We just laughed, and promised we would share any secrets we found as we looked for friends - single or married. It was all kind of funny, but nice to talk about how we were in similar situations, and to just know we're not alone.

There we go... who would have thought I would be able to sit here and do such a catch up session of sorts.

(I've hurt my hand and am not much use out on the farm, so have been able to sit for an extended period of time without feeling the need to go out and help! :) )


I wish I had my book of quotes... I feel like some wisdom is needed, but I am lacking.

for now... Ciao is all I have.

xx

Picture catch up...

I actually had a moment to check out some of the pics on my memory card when I posted the last pics... and figured now was a good time to throw them up here!

It's by no means a very good record of what's been going on - and these ones were taken back in October.

I had a trip up to Auckland to catch up with some friends, and did a little drive around which was fun. All taken from the North Shore - Devonport area.

Obviously - taken from one of the hills looking down on a nearby beach. I just liked the angle of it. The scattering of people down below. It wasn't the most sunny of days - which made for a better day with the camera. :)


Rangitoto.... an island about an hour away from Auckland. You guessed it another volcanic feature of our mighty country. You can actually take a ferry out there and walk to the top. Something I have yet to do.


And there you have the skyline... the view of downtown Auckland over the other side of the harbour. Pity about the flag flying that day.... some big rugby game on that night I would imagine.

a night out....

Finally got a couple of shots of the beloved little Evita Mary!!

Went out to a bbq at Tessa's mums place last night to meet some of the locals. Funny how I mention the move to Canada and suddenly both Tess and Tamati go into "matchmaking" mode. It was hillarious to see their reaction at dinner the other night.

"but, but, but........you can't leave. I know, we'll find someone for you to settle down with...."

I just said that after 6 months, all I desperately wanted was some friends. People to do things with. People to talk to. I didn't think it would be this hard. And while Shane tells me that I just need to jump in the deep end - how much deeper can I go? I'm singing at church - pretty out there, pretty deep. I've invited anyone and everyone I've met out to coffee.... and have had resounding NOs. Is there something else? The people that I have met, and are keen to hang out are all 20. Nothing against that at all - but it is different.

Anyway... back to the bbq.

Lovely night out. Fantastic conversation... and even a time of prayer! How can you beat that?!

And then there was the mischief maker; Tawhai.
He was left to eat a bowl of cherries to his absolute delight! And yes, the mess on his face was priceless, as was the moment when we realised he was swallowing the seeds. Finally got him to spit them out.
I remember as a child I was convinced that I must have a million watermellon plants growing inside of me after each summer - and always wondered what happened to them???

Tawhai is ever changing and constantly growing. He's really such a great kid to have around, and so funny to watch as he entertains himself.
We were talking about how different Evita is to him. He was so laid back, and yet Evita is far more of a snuggly baby. Tawhai wouldn't go to sleep in your arms, while Evita would rather sleep there... and yet she's the one who lets you know when she's angry, and Tawhai just cruises along.
It's fun to watch the differences, and just know that they are part of you. I guess I'm becoming ever more protective of them both. Hope that just transpires into me praying for them more.

Today.... more horse stuff, and then Tess and I might go and see a movie. I think she's needing some time out just as much as me. :)

Blessings. xxx

exhausting....

I'm not sure which is worse - trying to do everything, or trying to hide by doing everything?

I've just realised that I've lost touch with so many people who still mean so much to me.
I haven't been a very good friend as of late. And realising that just makes me feel worse.

hehehehe... all most amusing, I know.

My holiday is almost over.
I was given full charge of the farm while my parents took off for my beloved South Island for a week, leaving me with a new stallion who had just arrived from Australia and all the other animals.
Jess (Tredway Aristocrat) arrived on Boxing day as my parents Christmas present to themselves. And lucky me. I got to bond with him as they fled straight after he arrived. I still haven't taken any pictures of him - but he has the sweetest head, and is really such a great horse to work with. He's off to his first show this weekend, which will really show what he's like behaviour wise. My old mare; Tui was in season the day after he got here, so after a quick vet check he was put to work! He was pretty excited! heheheh. Such a male!

Here's hoping she got in foal, and I get to have one more from her before her real retirement? Although I'd still like to get her driving again?!

Other than jess I had 4 other horses to get ready for the show, another one around the house and I had stupidly decided to paint the inside of my parents house as a wedding anniversary present. NUTS! I was up until 3 many mornings trying to get it all finished.

Must say it was worth it, as it does look really good. Thank goodness an old friend called in and helped me do some of the edging - as that was beginning to do my head in as I realised how tired I was.

Anyway... that's where I've been. Should anyone have wondered.

Now that it's almost time to go back to work - you never know, I may find time to write?!

As for the house hunt?! Nothing has come up - however, plane tickets to Calgary are looking pretty good, come August.

Kia kaha.
xx

looming....

Yes, the season to be jolly is just around the corner.... and with it comes the season of much baking.

For some crazy reason, I did it again!
Yep, little spicy men did fill up the kitchen over the weekend. It took me a while to get back into the swing of things this year, but I did manage to make a good little pile of the men to give away to clients and friends. I have a box full to be sent down south to the friends who write to say they are missing the baking fiascos. :)

I'm still in limbo status... wondering what it would be like to actually unpack and get my own computer out again. Probably not such a bad thing to not have the time, space or computer available to sit here for ages. Although I really have missed catching up on what's been going on with so many wonderful people.

Bring on the new year when I will have to decide should I stay or should I go?

I don't mean that in a bad way... more of an... let the adventures begin.

Exciting stuff!

Anyway... wanted to say HI.... to let you know that I am thinking of you, and just in case this doesn't happen again....until the new year that is;

A very merry Christmas to you all. Praying that you would have one filled with love, peace and blessings. And that you would have time to stop and reflect on all that this holiday is about.

Peace and joy.

xxxx