Wednesday afterrnoon... and I'm sitting on Jill and John's computer... not literally, of course!
The late afternoon sun beams are scattering around the room, and the view from here of the esteraury down bellow with a backdrop of the mountains makes me catch my breath.
and there is a peace.
I picked up the Purpose driven life before I left on this trip... skipped to Purpose 3, which seems to be the one that catches me every time. To be Christ like.
Today.... day 26, and I was just reading about the gifts of the Spirit - how was are always faced with the complete opposit to see what we will choose. To be faced with uncertainty, to be anxious, to worry..... I'm not meant to!
So, i'm practicing.... but I want to be active at the same time.
I'm just writing a covering letter for a job up in Wellington. Again - it's Wellington, but it's also perfect. At least, from what I know right now. So.... I'm actively seeking God, and praying his will, not mine. Again, that the door would swing wide, or slam shut now.
I got the call from the boss, who had very little to say. The owner of the company has written to say that he 100% commited to the changes that were meant to take place at the start of the year, but that he's delaying everything until September. I've voiced my opinion. I understand where he's coming from for the rest of New Zealand - but I can't do any more. I can't imagine what I would have to do until September.... twiddle my thumbs? I really do believe that there is a huge amount of potential for this company - but I've given all that I can with all that I have.
It's been an interesting experience, I've learnt a huge amount, but time for a different challenge. :)
So.... prayers would be appreciated. I had wanted to resign tomorrow - but think it would be foolish to do that without a job, especially when it would seem that i may end up in Wellington yet. I wish I could say that I felt God wanted me to move up to hamilton regardless of the job situation - but i don't know?
Is that faith in action, or foolishness?
So... trusting for peace, or open doors, wisdom through it all.
There you go... not much going on, huh. hehehe.
I'm just charging the camera battery - and then I'll be out there snapping away the sights. Hopefully I'll have something to share when I get home.
Peace and Joy!
Sunday, May 28, 2006
On the road again. Just can't wait to get on the road again......
The trip north waits, as does the packing and organising. All those last minute happenings. Very last minute. hehehe.
I'm looking forward to catching up with Jill and John, and just having some quiet time to myself. It will be nice to be on the road... singing away again. I guess the last two trips I've had company, which is, of course lovely... but I miss that time to just do whatever I want. hehehe. Sounds kind of bad... but I promise I'm being good... I just want to sing at the top of my lungs, and enjoy everything. Soak up the sights. Take pictures as I go. And I guess, say goodbye in a way.
I may get one more trip up there before I leave. Will have to talk to Graham about all of that when he calls on Tuesday.
This week is going to be all about submitting. Letting go, and letting God. I'm not sure where He actually wants to take me right now. I'm scared as anything about this next month. I don't remember the last time I felt so totally unsure, unsettled, unknown. There is really nothing physically stable right now. And I know this is where I'm being challenged the most. To just relax, and rely on God.
So much easier said than done....
But God said to me
"my grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."
Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weakness, so that Christ's power may rest on me.
2 Corinthians 12.9
Friday, May 26, 2006
another week has zoomed. that brings me closer to the whole.... time to be packed and moved and have that new job all sorted, and right now, I just feel so overwhelmed by everything.
I've had 4 rejection letters this week. Count them.... 4!
That's ok. None of them were the perfect job, or where God wanted me to be.... right?!
I've had all sorts of chaos with work, which is more than welcome in some respects. I like chaos. It keeps me on my toes, but it's just all come at the wrong moment. hehehe.
I sat down when I received a package today of samples to replace what had been taken from the car - and ended up pulling out something that I hadn't asked for, which was supposed to be something specifically for a customer next week, and all I could do was sit and cry. I had tried to be organised, I had tried to do everything the "right" way, and that didn't even work.
Anyway... I'm heading out to dinner with some friends, which will be lots of fun. And then, over the weekend - more catching up to do, and I'm so looking forward to doing some baking too. :)
Might even get some time to sit and play around on here. I still haven't got those pics uploaded.
Bare with me.... please.
"When a man is wrapped up in himself, he makes a pretty small package."
~ John Ruskin.
I'm afraid right now, I feel like that man, so it's really a reminder to myself.
Saturday, May 20, 2006
picture I took at the Markets ages ago....
Had the longest day ever yesterday... and while it was long, I still haven't managed to make it to bed at a slightly earlier hour to make up for it. Silliness! (there were the two Canadian hitch hikers. From Alberta no less!!! I dragged them up a hill in the freezing cold weather to check out the lights of Dunedin. We ate our dinner up there.... it was brilliant! They however must think I'm completely mad. I might meet them somewhere along the way yet?!)
The trip around with the boss was super productive. Pity no one had bothered to come ages ago. He's left knowing exactly what I do, the area that I cover, and the absolute madness of it all. He's going to try and get the job changed slightly so that it makes more sense for the person down here, and to get the pay increased.
I should have bugged them to come down months ago.
Now... he knows he has 2 weeks to come up with something pretty impressive to convince me to stay down here. I don't like the chances.
The other job... haven't heard anything more about it, which is a pity. Still, means Wellington is too far away from the family, and in some ways, I'm relieved.
There are a few other jobs down there that I'll apply for tomorrow, but a few up in Hamilton, which is a better plan. :)
There was snow on the mountains... and everything just looked so picture perfect. I haven't had a chance to check out the few pics that I did take, but hopefully I caught some of the perfectness. I'll post some soon.
For now... into the sweet night.....
Listening to Joy Williams.... and the song of the moment: "Say Goodbye"
Say goodbye, say goodbye to the you I knew before, say hello, say hello to a new beginning
You're different now, you're different somehow.......
Sunday, May 14, 2006
I'm been so super busy this week. I've got my boss coming on this next trip down south, which is going to be interesting. Prayers appreciated. I haven't ever had anyone come along with me on a trip - so I'm a little scared that I've maybe gotten too comfortable and he'll tell me I'm doing it all wrong?!
Applied for a job the other day, and had a phone interview yesterday, which was pretty exciting. They Lady was lovely, but they already have someone lined up for the position - so I'm really only a candidate if things go terribly wrong on Monday. hehehe. She'll email me to let me know. Prayers there too. :) hehehehe
Other than that... life has been filled with moving stuff, and trying to be organised. Looking around my room, it's not looking like I'm getting anywhere. 7 weeks to go! No idea how I'm going to get everything up to the farm, if in fact that's where I'm going.
The job I applied for is actually in Wellington. Had me scratching my head, really. I was convinced that God wanted me to be up on the farm, but this job is what I've wanted, and to get an interview the day after I've applied for it... put a spin on my world. I just figured I had to apply, and it would be good practice, plus meant I had to get my cv all organised.
So... praying for a slamed door, or one that is flung open on this job. It would mean that I would be covering all of the lower North island, which takes me to 2 hours south of the farm, so I could cruise home in the weekends. At least I would be in the same island. Wellington is only 6 hours south of Cambridge.
My car was broken into yesterday.... with all my samples stolen from out of the back. And how knows what of mine is missing? my change purse has gone, and they took some cd's, my sunglasses.... I pretty much live in my car, so I'm just so thankful that it didn't happen while I was away traveling, and that my car went in for a service on Monday, so I pretty much cleaned out all of my excess stuff before that. What a blessing my camera wasn't in it!!!
Unfortunately, I don't have home and contents insurance, so I'm really just praying that the company's insurance will cover all the samples that were in the back of the car. It's my own fault that my things won't be replaced.
I was just in shock yesterday... I can't for the life of me figure out how they even got into the car, and when it happened? So, reported it all to the police, and called and left a message for my boss, will have to face the other boss with it all tomorrow. Not looking forward to that one.
It was a day of highs and lows yesterday.
On that cherry note.... I need to go and warm up. My room is feeling more like a freezer. hehehehe. Winter has arrived! And NZ houses just aren't built for it.
Hope everyone is doing well over the other side.
Much love, and warm fuzzies!
"There is more hunger for love and appreciation in this world than for bread."
~ Mother Teresa
Saturday, May 06, 2006
at least, in body. I'm also away with the fairies right now.
It's been a rough kinda week away. In fact, I'm so emotionally exhausted, and ready to curl up and let the world just come crashing down around me. uhg.
The trip over the last week has been south and north... and talk about alot of driving. Today has been deemed a NO DRIVE day. Of course, today is also Saturday, and I'm about to head up the hill for my coffee, and chill out.
A hill or mountain is certainly somewhere I want to be when I'm feeling strung out. So I can watch the world go by.
Anyway. There are stories to tell, and things to catch up on - but for now, I'll leave it with a HUGE hello to everyone.
And.... one paper down! The 4 day course was pretty funny, though that in itself was draining. So hard to get back into the study frame of mind. hehe.
More people ask the Lord to lighten their burdens than ask him to stregthen their backs.